Middle East Solution

I have the answer to the Middle East conflict. Move Israel to Texas.

Geographically it works. There’s plenty of room: Israel is about 22000km2, Texas is over 268000km2. They are both deserts. They both have oil nearby.

Politically it works. The USA can demonstrate their implacable support for Israel without having to bother anybody half way around the world. Both countries only observe UN resolutions when it pleases them. If anybody who currently lives in what becomes New Israel doesn’t want to stay, then the Americans have experience of this. The dispossessed can live in “reservations”.

Militarily it works. Texans like guns, Israelis like guns. It will also be much easier to ship Patriot Missiles to New Israel from Alabama.

There would be very little language problem – all the Israeli spokesmen I hear already speak “US lawyer”, so they’d fit right in.

There might be a small setback if New Israel still want to compete in the Eurovision Song Contest, but I’m afraid everybody has to make some sacrifices and I would willingly suffer this as a contribution to world peace.

I think I should get the Nobel Peace Prize.

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